Mohd Noor Md Isa

29 March 1956 - 2 October 2015

 

He wasn't a hero,
Known by the world.
But a hero he was,
To his little girl.

My daddy was EVERYTHING ,
Who knew all things.
And better than everyone ,
With the gifts he'd bring.

I knew his voice,
Before I could speak.
And loved it when,
He would sing me to sleep.

He changed my diapers,
And sat up all night.
When my body was weak
And I'd put up a fight.

He'd come home late,
With not much to say.
And made us all kneel,
As he taught me to pray.

He taught me life's lessons,
Of right from wrong.
And instilled in me values,
That I might be strong.

And so through the years,
Like a hero he stood.
Working to give,
All that he could.

His presence was important,
And we loved to see him smile.
For no one in the world,
Could emulate his style.

And so dear Dad,
My best memory to recall.
Is the gift of your presence,
The greatest gift of all.

I miss you Abah , its been really hard since you left us . Mom had changed a lot , she kept crying and scolding us . I didn't blame her for that  , I knew that she's depressed . She's so strong and I admire her a lot & that really makes me cry ... seeing her in that condition . We love you so much Abah , its too early . It's still too early . You left us .. How could you Abah .. Im too young for this . I can't accept the truth that you're gone . I can't & I wont . I cried a lot & there's no one to pat my back when im down . I've waited for you everynight . Come back Abah .. I need you ... You promised me that you'll attend my graduation day , thats the day where I can proudly say '' look at me dad , are you happy? ''

I was mad at you for the first day of your death. I knew it was irrational , but your words played on loop in my memory. “I will not let go , I will be here to watch you grow up.” I know that wasn’t a promise your body was capable of making , and I forgive you . I hope you forgive me for being selfish . The times I cursed you for having such illness . Why? Why my dad? My wonderful , empathetic , silly dad? It never made sense to me . But it never will . Not everything happens for a reason , and I’ve learned that is something I must accept .

 

Abah , remember this date? 28th October . It's your wedding anniversary !! You've been together for 26 years and hoorayy !! There's only 20 days left until your anniversary ! Aren't you happy to have such a great woman & mother for your kids? I promise you Abah to fulfill your dream , to be success in the future & make you & Mom proud of us . Thank you Abah for your unconditional love .

He was always my pillar when I knew I'd fall
Always my anchor, so strong and tall
His hard face changes only for me
His softer side, so careless and free
He knows my dreams are too big for this place
His little girl's leaving, ready to begin her race
He knows I'll be thinking of him wherever I go
I know I'm ready to do this on my own
But still I cry and he holds me tight
He tries to be strong, not a tear in sight
I'm ready to reach for the stars in the sky
He's ready to watch his princess fly
It's time to let go, sure of a path to take
But now I know, even pillars can break
For when I drive away, trying to stifle my cries
All I could see were tears in my father's eyes

Posted by
Nasuha
♥ Thursday, July 2, 2015

I know it's not what you wanted , but seriously mom? can anyone be blamed? I've tried , mummy. I really tried . Im so down to myself .  I know you're upset, but I am too.

Yelling at me and ignoring me won't help. Yelling at me about how useless I can be , seem don't help either. For once , can't you give me some encouragement? You saw with your own eyes how hard I struggle during the exams? You may disagree with my way of studying , but the thing is you saw how hard I tried. You know well how different I am as compared to the past. Don't it count for something?

This isn't about you. You might feel upset but have it ever crossed your mind how much more upset I am? I might look strong and finding ways to make it look better. Working up situations to make things sound nicer but deep down , do you know how much stress I'm under?

I have footsteps to follow , but we're different people. Why are you always making comparisons? If you want to compare , why do you ignore those who did worse than me? Aren't you the very person who always said never to compare? Than why are you doing just so? It's easy to talk, but its not easy to do. Can you understand that?

It frustrates me that you immediately assume everyone studied more than me. Have you seen it? It frustrates me that you immediately turn on me claiming I only play but did nothing for exams. You were to one who kept insisting I go to bed and I reject it every time to study. How could you?

Why is it that my friends can console me and see how hurt I am but the one closest to me can't? Do you think I want it? Do you think I like it? Can you for once, just think about my feelings?

Can you for once just see how you're hurting me?

Posted by
Nasuha
♥

Oh look ! It's Andrew Garfield * nose bleed * * swoon *

Or also known as the Sexiest Man of 2015 by Glamour Magazine * swoon * T__T 

He's basically the reason why I watched Spiderman for hundred times . Hoho , shallow much? But look at that. Just look at that ! How cute can he get?

I was drooling and fantasizing about meeting him when I found some rumours on the web saying he's getting back with Emma Stone . What?! Its not even a rumours T_T ITS TRUE ! 

My heart broke into a million pieces .

 HE HAD GIRLFRIENDS?!

This is not right guys T.T

P.S This is the first time I've ever swoon publicly on my blog. My heart broke too much so I just have to get it out. T_______T

Posted by
Nasuha
♥

*Sighs ,  I was supposed to study right? But I ended up listening korean songs instead. This time , other than watching One Piece *oh my god oh my god* *nose bleed*  I started listening to BigBang song which was recommended by Aida - If You

I regretted it to the max . T___________T

Cause all of them are so cuteeeeeee .

 I DON'T KNOW WHO TO SUPPORT